Woo hoo! We're up to toy 4 of 8 in the Pirates of the Caribbean Happy Meal! I must stress, this is probably the coolest fucking Happy Meal toy line ever. It beats the ever living shit out of Barbies/Hotwheels. Though I gotta be honest, I am getting a little tired of McDonald's. As you can see, I switched up the last one and got Apple Dippers. I never had these apple dippers before. I was sort of expecting them to come in a Dunkaroos-type package. Apples in one end, a tub of caramel in the other. Not even close. You get a small bag of mediocre apples and packs of caramel identical to the packs that the nugget sauce comes in. I got TWO packs of caramel sauce, which was way more than I needed. Since I'm always looking for new and exciting ways to contract diabetes, I decided to dip the free pack of cookies I took in my caramel. Mmm... Cookie Dippers.

I wanted to give you guys a vaguely interesting update today instead of giving you a commercial like you really want. You know that little Plant in a Can I got a few weeks back? Motherfuckers gotten HUGE.



So huge, that I had to replant it. So huge, that I had to get a 3' stick for it to wrap around. So huge, it's topped the stick and I taped an American Flag pencil on the top and it's STILL growing above all that. There is a damn beanstalk growing on top of my cubicle. If it gets any bigger, I just might be able to climb to freedom. Or, y'know, to a Giant Castle. Whichever.