I was at the grocery store the other day buying....... what the hell was I buying..... oh well, the thing is, in front of the baking goods aisle instead of a display of Betty Crocker cake mixes, I found a large display of Dinosaur Plants. Being close to Easter, I chalked the $5 Dino plants up to basket stuffers, but having seen them on ThinkGeek and other similar sites for quite some time, I went ahead and dropped one in my cart. There's a certain weird sort of satisfaction I get when the cashier double-takes at one of my purchases. When I'm buying bread and meat, it's obvious I'm going to make some sammiches. When I'm buying Dinosaur plants and salsa con queso, God only know what sort of evening I'm planning.



The package cleverly saved on paper expenses by printing information and instructions on the inside of the box. A plant that's been around for so many million years can't possibly have that many care instructions, anyway. If I had to fertilize and make raptor noises at the thing, I certainly wouldn't have bought one. Inside I was supposed to find a few volcanic rocks and make a circle in the plastic bowl with them. I received 3 rocks in my pack, so I could only forge a triangle. I put my dried hunk of vegetation in the middle and poured some water on top.



Lo and behold, a few hours later it opened all the way up and ate my neighbor's dog.